That Girl.2

We got that waiting in the clinic silence

Shhh don’t tell nobody what we did silence

And im so tired of being your hamper and im about to wash out those week old ketchup stains secrets and do laundry in that silence yu like keeping it quiet

But my vagina is not your walk it closet

You wanna stuff your unmentionables through me

Want a place to hang up your insecurities

Want me to keep take of your hand me downs and prada

Waiting for every occasion to put me back behind closed doors in the darkness

Nobody knows yu hold my hand

Nobody knows I call yu baby and

Nobody knows yu write anonymous poems about me the ones yu can’t post on facebook

Because regardless yu may think im worth or what yu may think I deserve

I will never be that girl who’s only makin yu smile when she’s making yu orgasm

That girl who’s day job is daydreaming waitin for her night job

That girl who’s so in love that will turn her body over for your superficial touch

Yu hide me behind locked doors and bed sheets

Bercause if yu dare reached out everyone know it’s about me

Livin in your heart in your mind

You’re still wrapped up in me

My tear ducts yu own them my heartstrings are wrapped up in every single one your fingers

And yu may say its over and never say yu love me but its ok yu don’t have to cuz silence speaks volume

Yu wanna hold me in your arms and rock me to sleep then act like yu don’t know me.

As if the moments we spent together are some kind of down payment

as if my bedroom were layaway where me & yu just layaway that’s all we ever do cuddle up make love and in the morning up pull up the hoodie and run the other way

I’m like that bastard child the reason daddy never hung around in the first place

But for me rejection doesn’t come every other weekend it comes every time yu lower your head when yu pass by without speaking and I remember there was a time yu could barely take your eyes off of me

I just don’t understand why it’s not ok for you to love me

I guess yu just want me to be that girl

The girl that everyone wants to sleep with but no one ever wants to be with

That girl only good enough for finding a suitable replacement

and I tried to make up for the mistakes but yu convinced yourself that she means everything and yu want nothing to do with me but come on baby she looks just like me.

Read the signs.

Or at lease take a good look at the facial features

Cuz I was your first your only she’s phony I am the prototype and she’s just the duplicate

And Yu can’t make copies without first consulting the blueprint

Yu know what they say the sequel is never better than the original

She tries to write you stories but yu know there only half as good

So half squinting you only hold her half as tight as yu should

Because the other half is tangled up in my bedhseets

And the other half is complete with my mind soul and body

& your other half is french tonguing me Monday thru Friday

I’m not fighting for joint custody i'm fightin for RESPECT.

Because I will NEVER be content being your back door hoe your something on the side

Your something to do during those lonely nights your closet freak

Yu will never reduce me to a skank a slut or a whore that will love yu

Id rather spend every night crying alone on my bedroom floor than ever be that girl.

Now That's that....

I set goals, take control, && define my own destiny . I make mistakes but learn from everyone's.&& when it's all said and done I bet this sistah be a better one.If I upset you dont stress, never forget, that God isn't finished with me yet.

-Rai

Simple.

"first yu must understand that we are all ignorant.

not in the sense of stupidity but unknowingly."

-Rai

&& i see.

&& i see that yu are with me && i am with yu.
yu carry my spirit && i your soul.
i relieve all the drama and stress that yu carry its old.
yu kill the horrific nightmares and live happily in my dreams.
they always ask if we are as good as we seem.
the answer is always yes. because when i look into your eyes i see a little bit of me
i see that yu are with me && i am with yu.

ily. <3

That Girl.

You're that girl...
That he told Shhhh
We keep this on the low.
Shhhh
Don't nobody gotta know.
but++
two days later
at school they callin yu a hoe.

You're that girl...
That holds her head down
When she walks in a crowd.
Cuz They still taunt yu && snicker.
His homeboys surround him && yell "that's my ni**a!"

You're that girl....
That looks like that other girl
who he is now seeing.
who he is now dating
who he is now fucking
&& she has taken your place only to be replaced
once again by yu.

You're that girl...
He apologizes to.
Says he never meant to hurt yu
&& he's so sorry; he was a fool.
&& Yu take him back &&
it's the same ol slack.
Yu fuck em'
Yu suck em'
He nuts.
He bust.
Yu wanna kiss.
He just wanna dismiss
Yu so he can dip

&& yu there yu sit.
In those soiled bed sheets
thinkin what if this cycle repeats.


I think it's a shame.
but++ you're that girl...
who's hoeish ways are her new claim to fame.

RaiOut

Skool.

Yes.

It's true.

Summer is winding down &&

School is coming is fast.

Monday to be exact.

I'm glad.

Welcome to Seniority.

++but i was a senior mentally//morally before one physically//society-like.

School.

SKOOL.

is cool//kool

but these yung folks like to act a fool.

when it comes to education they say its second

&& that money that mula that bread the cheese everything but the butter

is first but they can't even open a bank account but can count the bills without a stutter.

....

RaiOut

1020a

Have to finish my summer reading.